Sunday, September 8, 2013

You Might Be a Tired Mommy if...

You might be a tired mommy if (true stories of my past week):

- You spend a couple hours in the car, running errands from one place to another, ALONE, before realizing the songs you've been singing along to on the ipod this whole time are from the playlist labeled "Sesame Street."

- You've been at Children's hospital over 3 hours, all over several different departments, (oh AND the gas station) before noticing your pants are on INSIDE OUT, tag poking out proudly and all!

- You spill your soft drink all over the car seat and begin to cry. The best part? My 4 year old scolding me to stop crying b/c it was annoying him.  He, however, was allowed to throw an Oscar-worthy tantrum for an hour at the doctor's office that same morning.

- You get frustrated that the burner on the brand new stove isn't working.  "Why isn't the meat browning?! I don't have time for this..." "Mom." my daughter says "You turned the oven on, not the stove burner."

- The receptionist at the clinic empathetically points out that you have crackers on your cheek, spit up all down your back, and some more chewed up crackers in your hair.  And your response is "I know."  (I had no intention of doing any more laundry and there is certainly no time for a shower.) The one I DIDN'T know but DID care about?  My shirt was still lifted above my right boob from my last nursing session, and my tank bra was unsnapped... (you couldn't see anything, it's more the concept that I found humiliating.)

- You try 3 times to pull the door open (another doctor's office) before your 9-year-old smiles and pushes it open for you.

- You finally get that shower you've been needing (seriously, it's a favor to society at this point) then go to brush your hair and find you never rinsed out the shampoo...

-Today's shower included the toddler, so I figured I had a few extra minutes to devote to shaving my legs.  I emerged from the shower with one hairy leg. I had shaved the same one twice.