Friday, September 6, 2013

Encouragement for the Weary at Heart

Some days I really need some encouragement.  That who I am and what I do matters.  That I am storing up my treasures in Heaven while treasuring my own slice of heaven at home.  If you're human, you have these days as well.

By tomorrow mid morning, in less than 5 days, I will have:
had 6 doctor appointments, 2 meetings, an ECFE class with Bruce, delivered 4 meals, went to several stores to pick up groceries for a friend from church, schooled my children 3 days (Monday was a holiday -although we did do some learning, and one day was just too busy), washed dishes 5 times, washed and folded 13 loads of laundry, pitched a tent, cleaned the turtle tank, cleaned the litter boxes, cooked for my own family, pumped milk for my meeting (that's on Saturday - it doesn't count in this list) and to donate, took my kids to the zoo, went to the pharmacy twice, showered twice (before you get grossed out you should volunteer to babysit 20 minutes instead), fought with the roof contractor, made s'mores and hot dogs on the fire, balanced both my checkbook and Advisory's (I'm treasurer for a PTA group), written 7 cards, paid bills, and cried.

Bruce is sitting in my lap, boob in mouth, sick with a fever of 102.2 (no idea why).  I'm awake b/c it is the only time I can get things done, and even then I am limited, as my lap and boob are currently in use, LOL.  Only way I can calm him down.

The pulmonologist prescribed several new meds for Taylor's asthma and is treating her bronchitis.  How did she get that sick?  We have too damn many doctors to see and too many ailments and too many meds - I simply struggle to keep track of it all and to prioritize.  Many days I am coasting on fumes to survive the day.  For example, today I ate a bowl of cereal, a potato topped with tomatoes (no dairy, remember?), a salad, 2 Coke's and 3 mini Kit Kat bars.  It doesn't really give me energy.

So I sat down to type.  I intended to complain, and I am a bit, but not as much as I had planned, believe me.  Instead I am overcome with gratitude.  Somehow it just started pouring out of me -- I'm glad for the lack of sleep and showers due to a sick baby because it means I HAVE a baby - he is alive and in my arms!  I am grateful for the 12 meds Taylor takes, the 5 for Julia, the 2 for Bruce, and the 7 for me because there IS medicine.  Taylor was having such trouble breathing and the inhaler and nebs have given great relief.

I'm grateful I was able to bless others with meals and running errands and a card of encouragement. I have been blessed in this manner more than once and am grateful I am well enough to do the same for others.  And I am grateful for this time awake with sick baby because I had failed to make time to read the Bible today.

Here are the scriptures I found encouraging today:

1 John 5:14 - "And this is the confidence we have toward Him, that if we ask anything according to His will He hears us."  -- God hears my prayers!! He IS listening. It is important to note that it must be "according to His will."

Psalm 120:1 "I call on the Lord in my distress, and He answers me."

We prayed for Taylor to feel better - to be able to breathe and for her cough to go away.  Leaving her appointment yesterday, treatment plan including EIGHT meds in hand, is when I broke down in tears.  But it turns out, the meds helped and God did answer that prayer.  Today we prayed we'd find her glasses, missing since our campout Monday night.  Hoping for that pray to be answered promptly!

Matthew 11:28-29 - "Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls."

I needed to hear this, as my body is just so weak.  I get very little sleep, I have a fever and my muscles hurt, I just feel weak, exhausted, worn out.  I was up till 3 am Tuesday night cooking and cleaning, then up before 7 to get to the doctor.  So I am seeking His rest - for my body AND my soul.  I've been discouraged none of it matters, but He assures us it does.

Psalm 55:22 - "Cast your cares on the Lord and he will sustain you; He will never let the righteous fall." and 1 Peter 5:7 "Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you."

It is important for me to hear this today. I don't feel like anyone cares for me this week, honestly.  A number of things have led me to feeling useless, discouraged, lonely, and disheartened. If no one else, God cares.  He alone will sustain me when my energy is drained and I need to keep plugging forward!

2 Corinthians 4:16-18 "So we do not lose heart.  Though our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day. For this light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal."

Wow. I am excited for that heavenly body and to be free of pain! A very dear friend is battling cancer and has been ill and suffering for a very long time. My heart aches for her and her family and my daughters remember to pray for her every day.  No matter what our ailment, our inner self is renewed each day.

Isaiah 41:10 - "So do not fear for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God.  I will strengthen you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand."   -- I worry about money, about my children's health, about time management and honoring my commitments.  His Grace is sufficient!

So I am feeling renewed and encouraged.  Grateful for all my blessings. And ready to grab 3 hours of sleep before I plug forward and do it all again!